Hypnochimps Crazyland

Photo-shop genius and full time B3tan Beau Bo D'or has opened his own website, its well worth a look around, cast your eyes over the 'nicked section' and it will make you realise just how popular his stuff is Linky

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" "Well... are you religious?" He said yes. I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant ? "Protestant." "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist" "Wow! Me too!
Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?" "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too!
Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.

Avast ye scurvy Dogs its international talk like a pirate day

Admit it: You want to be the sole survivor of an airline disaster. You aren't looking for a disaster to happen, but if it does, you see yourself coming through it. I'm here to tell you that you're not out of touch with reality—you can do it. Sure, you'll take a few hits, and I'm not saying there won't be some sweaty flashbacks later on, but you'll make it. You'll sit up in your hospital bed and meet the press. Refreshingly, you will keep God out of your public comments, knowing that it's unfair to sing His praises when all of your dead fellow-passengers have no platform from which to offer an alternative view. clicky click

Before her untimely death Mo mowlam was booked to do a speaking tour of the country, see how one venue chose to sensitively deal with her passing (scroll down) thanks to B3ta...

Its amazing what you can do with a bit of eye-shadow and a layer of foundation

A 40 year old Whiskey is considered something of a luxurious rarity, at auction it may sell for thousands. Over the years the flavour matures and it becomes a different drink to that which was bottled. Would it be the same with a 40 year-old beer? This chap decides to investigate

Q: Who was the last to fuck the Aussies and
bring back the Ashes?
A: Paula Yates.

Total headcases, the LSD riders

Fucking brilliant way to fight back against junkmail (of the postal kind) as far as I can tell it should work in this country. linky

anyone who attended EVO this year will remember this.

Very odd crochet

George Bush Don't like Black people (MP3 right click save as)

The back fell off my monitor...

Rap critics that say he's "Money Cash Hoes,"
I'm from the hood stupid what type of facts are those.
If you grew up with holes in your zapitos,
You'd celebrate the minute you was havin' dough.
Those who dedicate their lives to giving critique to rap/hip hop performers claim that I am only about monetary funds, paper currency to represent those funds, and promiscuous women. However they are not unaware that I once lived in a "project", per se, where my foot apparel often had holes in it. It is my hypothesis that if they had lived a childhood that paralleled mine they would also have reason to assemble with the intention of celebration.

revel in the glory of Rap Translations

Ya-harrrr me hearties, thats no scar, look at me shark bite! Well now you can compare your BMX injuries and stanley knife mishaps online at SCARMAGEDDON (probably requires strong-ish stomach)

I'm not sure whether it constitutes an Executive Toy or not - Plug this little man's ball & chain into your bathtub and turn on the taps, then basically he floats until he drowns

Get hyper-environmentally friendly with the Johnny applesandal